i have 2 days 14 hours 45 minuntes left here! i am SOOO happy!!! :) i havent been writing lately and there has been so much that has happened. yes theres been some fights, of course lol. im in a great mood right now if you couldnt tell.
so all week, last week, i was cleaning my room so gabby and emmy could come over but on thursday... well something happened. i was cleaning my bathroom and heard yelling so i went into the hall and beth was in jesses face yelling hit me hit me i dare you go ahead and hit me ill call the cops on you. i said what the hell is going on and she said that we had been being asses to her. umm ive been cleaning my room actually. she started yelling at me and got in my face telling me to hit her and she was acting like she was going to hit me and i said i wasnt going to while my hands were in the air by my head, my palms were faceing her like you would if you were at gun point. then she started yelling at me to get the hell out of the house of shed call the cops and i said go ahead i dont care. she took off outside and i called mom to tell her i may have to cops called on me.
i "ACCIDENTLY" overheard beth that night telling someone that we were idiotic kids coming after her and shes afraid to be in her own house. then told them she was so close to punch the shit out of me. and jesse was in her face threatening her and that tesa leaves bruises on her and i taunt my mom. all this crap, well i go tosme of it recorded and i took notes. maybe you shouldnt talk to some one on the deck when its rihgt next to my room... dad came home yelled at her and left. that night we were all in bed and he called us down and yelled t all of us. he took away all phones, tv rights, computer privaliges, everything. then let us go to bed.
my dog was OUTSIDE and i went to get her and beth said no you dont and told dad like a little girl. he yelled at me to come but i couldnt find sbnow and so i burstedinto tears on my way downa nd beth was all oh whatever kelsey all rude to me. he yelled at me and i was pissed by then. they made her stay outside all night but at one i let her in until morning. they kept her outsid efrom then on.
i went ot school and told my friends we couldnt hang out. i go thome took my cell phone back and took off for a walk. dad was gone and i was NOT gunna stay home with beth alone. i went down the back road, passed the church, stayed by the ditch for a bit. the water was running and it was reminding me of some good old times. then i went down the road some more to this huge tree. i walked around it and found a way to the trunk, i looked up. the perfect tree for climbing. i climbed till i was about 10 ft off the ground. there was all these twigs like a birds nest but human sized so i sat down on it and stayed for a while. he told me if i didnt come home he would call the cops on me cuz he doesnt have to deal with this crap. i came home and we had a talk.
he told me to give him my phone back and i said no. i told himi didnt know hwere it was and that pissed him off. i went into my bathroom to clean up from crying and he came in. i shut the door after he yelled at me a bit. he slammed the door open and it hit me pretty hard then he went to grab my arm. he barely got a finger on me when i backed up and said DONT touch me. he told me you need to be careful little girl. he took my charger from me and left.
that morning he came and yelled at me saying this wasnt over and im still in trouble. i told him to go away and i didnt wanna hear him. he yelled and said your mine for the next three days so you better watch it. if it were 60 years ago, even 20 i would beat your ass with a 4 foot stick and youd deserve it and you still do right now. that built fire in me and i started to become a little afraid he would hurt me. i got dressed to go to tesas play and he came in and said what are you all dressed up for. i was like tesa play, no your not going, why, your grounded, i dont understand why i have to be grounded, your not really gunna make me say it, i dont know why, i fyou go i will call the cops.... I AM FREAKIN TIRED of being told that im having the cops called on me. im a teenager for crying out loud. this is so stupid and rediculous!!! my tought is that if someone tells you to get the hell out of the house and the cops will be called, both have happened MANY times to me, you should take the note and know that your not wanted. why would dad even fight for me to be with him when 1 i HATE it there and 2 im always being told crap like that. he sayd its the heat of the moment and people say what they wouldnt other wise. but it keeps happpening so there something more that just the heat of the moment....
i didnt get ot go but mom came by and gave me some treats Leah made us, THANK YOU Leah!!! i had mom take snow with her, she didnt deserve tto be treated like crap too.
dad came home and thanked me for not going and asked if i talked to mom, i said no not thinking. Lilah told beth my mom came by and dad rushed ina dnyelled at me for lying and told me all this crap about how im not good enougha dn basically tld me i was stupid. then he asked where snow was and sarah said that my mom took her and he came in aand yelled at me agian saying that i was only thingking about myself and not my dog and that i was going to kill her. i said she was safer there than here and that really pissed him off. i just went ot bed.
that morning i got ready for church and PACKED ALL MY STUFF, i still have a bit that isnt packed but that will change this afternoon. i took off my clothes because a hour and half passed after church started. he came in and told me to get dressed because we were leaving. i went to my class room and dad said my name and waved and said hi like we were close family i rolled my eyes and turned straight to my class.
we talked abou the lost sheep in suday school and temple marraige in young womens.
when i go out i got a text that said i took beth to the emergancy room from my dad. she stopeed breathing apperently. brother reynolds took us home but jesse had a meeting with bishop. brawner called me later and asked chicken or pizza i was confused and asked what he ment. he was bring us dinner and i said not to worry about it. but he brought us pizza. instead of going to little ceazars down the road he went into town and got papa johns... thanks i felt guilty already and he wasnt making it any easier.
dad came home and we were watching tv so to cover up we played uno, I WON! but he caught us but we didnt get into trouble. guess what we had for dinner, CHICKEN lol. we eat and played uno until about 845. i kept winning so everyone called me a cheater but when tesa shuffled and i won they got kind of mad. i was in bed and jeran came in and gave us all our stuff back that dad had taken.
things have seemed to calm down a bit but im stressed out my finals. i now ill do good but im still a little uncertain. i grew fern in my bioology class and my teacher is letting my take them home and keep them. im so proud of myself that i grew FERNS FROM SPORES, i have to sew them and everything. now i will have ferns in my new house. i feel so accomplished because not many kids in my class even had the spores germinate much less have them grow and mine are still growing. i want to keep them and make them live!
WEDNESDAY is my last day here!!! WOO HOO!!!! PARTY TIME!!! ;D
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